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Their Attitude Stinks

Pharmacy | Right | November 14, 2014


(An order comes to my pharmacy for a well-known antibiotic. This antibiotic is known to smell exactly like rotten eggs, so most of us just hold our breath while we count it and try not to think about it too much. We dispense it to a woman who is picking it up for her teenage son. Everything is normal and she leaves with the prescription, but about 10 minutes later she comes stomping back into the pharmacy, pretty much shoves the person that I am currently helping out of the way, and throws the bottle of medication on the counter.)

Customer: “I want to speak to your manager right now! You guys gave me rotten medication!”

Me: “Really? Let me look at the expiration date on your bottle. Normally we don’t keep anything that has one less than a year away.”

(I look at the bottle and see that the pharmacist wrote a date of over a year away, and I go over to our stock bottle and check and the numbers correspond with each other.)

Me: “Hmm. Well, ma’am, it doesn’t look like this medication is expired but I will have the phar—”

Customer: “You are just lying! I mean, come on and open that bottle! It smells totally rotten! I can’t believe that you would ever give someone bad medication! My son is very very ill!”

Me: “Oh, that’s just because the active chemical that is in this medication has a bad smell. Trust me, I wish there was something that we could do about it back here, too. Most of us hold our breath while we count it.”

Customer: “Stop ****** lying to me. You just don’t want to admit you did something wrong! I will have your job for this, b****!

(At this point the pharmacist who has been listening the whole time walks over.)

Pharmacist: “Ma’am, while I don’t like the fact that you are calling my staff names like that I will let you know two things. One is, certain chemicals have a bad smell. It’s just a fact of life. So, while I know that smell is unpleasant, it’s just one of those side effects that come with being able to take medications that will help your sick son. I assure you it’s supposed to smell that bad. If it didn’t, it wouldn’t work right. Two, since you don’t seem to want to listen to my employees and call them awful names, this will be the last time that you or any members of your family can shop or fill any type of medication here. Maybe in the future you can learn how to treat people the way you want to be treated.”

(The woman proceeded to turn bright red with embarrassment and tried to apologize, but my boss wouldn’t hear it. That was almost two years ago and he still will not allow her or her family to fill their prescriptions at his pharmacy.)
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Old 12-08-2019   #81
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No Scan, No Scam

Pharmacy | Right | July 10, 2012


(I work in a store in a small town where most of the customers are elderly and sweet. If a price doesn’t come up, I will generally trust a customer if they say they know the exact price.)

Me: “Oh, there’s no bar code on this.”

Customer: “Well, it was $39.99, but I guess that doesn’t help you.”

Me: “Well, I can enter it manually. You’re sure it was $39.99?”

Customer: “Actually, it was…$19.99.”

Me: “Sir, do you really want me to call for a price check and make you and all the people behind you wait ten minutes for someone to come up here?”

Customer: *defeated* “…It was $39.99.”
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Not Ever Working

Pharmacy | Working | July 9, 2012


(The pharmacy I work at has just lost several techs at once, so we’ve hired a few new people. One of these new coworkers isn’t working out at all.)

Pharmacist: “Hey, could you help out in the front for a minute? I think [coworker who isn’t working out] could use a hand.”

Me: “Sure. Hi, [regular customer], what can I do for you?”

Regular Customer: “Oh good, I’m trying to get a refill.”

New Coworker: *to Regular Customer* “I keep telling you, you don’t have any!”

Me: *to Regular Customer* “Let me just check on it for you.”

New Coworker: *to me* “Why? I already told him he didn’t have one.”

Me: “Actually, he has enough refills for the rest of the year. What are you looking at?”

New Coworker: “No, you’re wrong. I know what I saw!”

Regular Customer: “I knew I had some..I was starting to think I was going to have to call my doctor. Thank you so much, [my name]!”

New Coworker: *to Regular Customer* “You need to leave right now. GET OUT!”

Me: *to New Coworker* “Whoa, what do you think you’re doing? You do not have ANY authority to kick a patron out.”

New Coworker: “He’s being unruly.”

Me: “What? No, he’s not. You’re just being rude.”

New Coworker: “No, you’re just trying to make me look stupid. I know exactly what I saw.”

(I examine my new coworker’s computer screen.)

Me: “You were looking at the wrong person.”

New Coworker: “No, I wasn’t!”

Me: “Sorry, but the name on your screen is a woman’s. [Regular Customer] is a man. It happens.”

New Coworker: “You changed it!”

Regular Customer: “Are you kidding me? Listen kid, you were wrong. It’s not that big of a deal. It happens. Just man up already.”

New Coworker: “You, shut up! I’m not talking to you, old man!”

(The pharmacist has been listening to the entire conversation. He decides he’s had enough.)

Pharmacist: *to New Coworker* “Get over here, right now!”

New Coworker: *rudely* “I’m BUSY! I’m trying to work, but—”

Pharmacist: “Get your stuff. You’re fired.”

New Coworker: “You can’t fire me!”

(At this point, the store manager also comes over.)

Store Manager: “I can. Get your stuff. You are not longer employed here.”

New Coworker: “YOU CAN’T FIRE ME! I DIDN’T DO ANYTHING WRONG! YOU PEOPLE ARE JUST TRYING TO MAKE ME LOOK STUPID!”

Regular Customer: “No one has to try and make you look stupid, son. You’re doing a fine job of that all by yourself.”

(My coworker carried on and screamed obscenities. We ended up having to call the police to remove him from the store
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Plz Change Abbrev, Stat

Pharmacy | Right | July 9, 2012


(If a customer gets regular medication from a pharmacy, they can have a Medicine Use Review (MUR). It’s basically talking through their meds with a pharmacist. I answer this call from a sweet elderly caller.)

Me: “Hello, pharmacy.”

Customer: “Um hello, someone just delivered my medicine. The bag has a sticker on it that says “Patient eligible for MUR.” What it is MUR?”

Me: “It stands for “Medicine Use Review,” which involves discussing your medicines with the pharmacist. However, those labels are meant for our reference, so I apologise that it’s been put on your bag by mistake. Sorry if it caused confusion.”

Customer: “Oh, that’s alright, dear. I just thought MUR might be short for murder!”

Me: “Er no, ma’am! Don’t worry, no one is going to murder you!”

Customer: “Oh, good! Thank you very much
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Old 12-08-2019   #84
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Feeling Man-strual

Pharmacy | Right | June 24, 2012


(I am working the prescription counter when a big, burly 6-foot or so tall man comes to the counter. Note: I am a female.)

Me: “Hello, how can I help you?”

Customer: “Um, I think…” *trails off*

Me: “I’m sorry, sir…could you say that again?”

Customer: *leans in close* “I think I got my first period.”

Me: *speechless*

Customer: “I’m bleeding down there, and I’m really hurting in my stomach.”

Me: “Sir, men don’t get those. You need to go to the hospital.”

Customer: “I knew you girls would be insensitive! I’m leaving!”

(I didn’t see him again. I still hope he got to a hospital!)
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Old 12-08-2019   #85
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Employees Are Sharper Than You Think

Pharmacy | Right | June 20, 2012


(Pharmacy law in Utah says that it’s up to the pharmacist’s discretion if they want to sell insulin needles/syringes without a prescription. Our store has the policy that the patient either has to have a prescription for the syringes or for an injectable medication on file.)

Customer: “I need to get some syringes.”

Me: “Okay, I need your name so I can look up the prescription.”

Customer: “Actually, they’re not for me. They’re for my mom.”

Me: “Okay, what’s her name?”

Customer: “Well, not my mom. My best friend’s mom who’s like a mom to me.”

Me: “What’s her name?”

Customer: “Actually, it’s for her dog.”

Me: “What’s the dog’s name?”

Customer: “I…don’t know.”

Me: “Then I’m not selling you any syringes.”

Customer: *walks away in defeat*
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Old 12-08-2019   #86
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Contextual Innuendos

Pharmacy | Right | June 19, 2012


(I’m at work on a Saturday with a clerk and a pharmacist. I notice the clerk speaking with an elderly woman out front but don’t think much of it. A few minutes later, the clerk comes back with a strange expression on her face and tells me I have to go help the woman.)

Me: “What can I help you with?”

Customer: “I’m looking for a vibrator.”

Me: “A…vibrator?”

Customer: “Yes. I had one, but I used it too much and it wore out.”

Me: “I don’t think we have anything like that. Where did you buy the first one?”

Customer: “At another pharmacy, but I want one with a long handle so it can reach better.”

(At this point I’m biting the inside of my cheek in an effort not to laugh.)

Me: “What kind of vibrator are you looking for, exactly?”

Customer: “You know! One of those that rub your feet!”

Me: “OH! Sorry, we don’t have anything like that.”
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Not Lacking For Laxatives

Pharmacy | Right | June 17, 2012


Me: “**** Pharmacy, how can I help you?”

Customer: “Yeah, I gotta question for you: I drank a whole thing of prune juice like water, and now I’m s***ing my brains out.”

Me: “Okay, and what did you need to know?”

Customer: “Is your generic of ducolax the same thing?”

Me: “Yes. Same thing.”

Customer: “Okay, good, because I’m gonna need a plug soon or something!”
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Getting Burned Can Be A Pain In The Butt

Pharmacy | Right | June 15, 2012


(It is a very windy day during summer, and a power line has blown over in the field behind our store.)

Me: “Hello, [pharmacy] how may I help you?”

Customer: “I need to see if you have [hemorrhoid cream] in stock.”

Me: “Alright, let me check…”

(At this point, I put him on hold to check our stock when a fireman walks in. He tells us they are evacuating all the buildings in the area, and that we have 5 minutes to get out. I go back to pick up the phone so the customer isn’t on hold forever.)

Me: “Sir, we do have it in stock. However, I can’t help you right now. I’m being told to evacuate the building.”

Customer: “Does it have aloe vera in it?”

Me: “I don’t know. As I said, I need to hang up. Please call back tomorrow.”

Customer: “Can you see if you can order it for me?”

Me: “Sir, there is a field fire right behind the pharmacy and I really can’t answer your questions right now. I was told by the fire department to evacuate. Please, call back another time.”

Customer: “Well, fine then. I’ll just get it somewhere else!” *hangs up*
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Old 12-08-2019   #89
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Out Of Brain Cells

Pharmacy | Working | May 22, 2012


(At the pharmacy where I work, I do a lot of training of new employees. This day’s trainee is particularly slow on the uptake.)

Me: *to new employee* “Now, when the customer pays in cash and just hands you a bill, you should repeat back to them how much they gave you. For example, when a customer gives you a $20 bill, you say, ‘Out of $20,’ as you make change.”

(This is a technique to help avoid after-the-fact disputes about the denomination of the bills customers hand over.)

New Employee: “Got it.”

(The customer walks up and pays cash, handing him a $20. The new employee says nothing.)

Me: *to new employee* “What are you forgetting?”

New Employee: “Um…”

Me: “Say the amount they gave you.”

New Employee: “Oh, right…”

(The next three customers all pay cash, and as they each fork over a crisp clean $20 bill, the new employee performs flawlessly, verifying that it is indeed “Out of $20” with each transaction. I think he’s finally gotten it down until the fourth customer.)

New Employee: “That will be [price].”

Customer #4 : *hands over credit card*

New Employee: “Out of $20!”

Me: *facepalm*
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Time To Start Screening Customers

Pharmacy | Right | May 19, 2012


(A customer slams a bottle of sunblock on the counter.)

Customer: “This is worthless! I can’t believe you sell this!”

Me: “I’m sorry to hear that, sir.” *examines the empty bottle* “But this is the highest protection factor we have.”

Customer: “Well, it’s crap! I want a refund!”

Me: “Sorry, I can’t refund an empty bottle; it’s store policy.”

Customer: “Well, what do you expect?! I have two large windows!”
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A Game Of Kat And Birdie

Pharmacy | Right | April 5, 2012


(I work at a pharmacy and we are very busy, causing a few customers having to wait. The last woman in line finally steps up.)

Me: “I apologize for your wait. How can I help you?”

Customer: “Does your name tag say your name is Kat?”

Me: “Yes, ma’am, how can I help you?”

Customer: “Did you have some crazy new age parents or something? Why would they name you after an animal? That’s just dumb! You should have a good sturdy name, like mine!”

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, but what can I help you with?”

Customer: “I need a refill.”

Me: “Of course. Can I get your date of birth?”

Customer: *gives me her date of birth* “And the prescription is under Birdie.”

Me: “Okay, it’s put in and will be ready in 15 minutes.”

Customer: “Thank you. I’m sorry you have such a foolish name.”

Pharmacist: “Did that woman just tell you your name was foolish and complain about people with “animal” names?”

Me: “Yeah.”

Pharmacist: “But her name was Birdie…”
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Less Is More, More Or Less, Part 3

Drug Store, Pharmacy | Right | March 30, 2012


(Our store regularly runs a promotion on the various vitamin brands for ‘BOGO’, buy 1, get 1 free. A customer comes up to the register with a bottle of a brand on the BOGO promotion. I am also an avid couponer and I regularly take in coupons for items we carry that I won’t use so that I can give them to customers.)

Me: “Sir, I see you’re buying a [brand] item. This week we currently have this whole line at Buy One, Get One Free. If you do get another one, I also have a coupon I can give you which is good for $2 off two items. So instead of getting one for $9.99 you can get 2 for eight bucks and change.”

Customer: *quite angrily* “What the h*** is wrong with you people? I just want my vitamins. Why are you always trying to push me to buy extra stuff and give you more money!?”

Me: “I’m…sir, I apologize. I probably wasn’t clear you’ll get twice as many vitamins and spend two dollars less—”

Customer: “Oh f*** this. You’re all scam artists!” *storms off without paying*

Me: *stares in disbelief*

Next Customer:“So…can I use that coupon?”
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No Pain, No Vain

Pharmacy | Right | March 29, 2012


(A customer comes in to return a home leg waxing kit.)

Me: “Can I ask why you are unsatisfied with this product?”

Customer: “It hurts!”

Me: “Yes, because waxing involves ripping the hair out by the roots.”

Customer: “Well, it shouldn’t hurt!”
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You Better Belize It

Pharmacy | Right | March 19, 2012


(I live in Belize. A lot of tourists think they can get away with anything in my country. One day, a foreigner walks into the store.)

Customer: “Can I get some Diazepam?”

Me: “Do you have a prescription?”

Customer: *tries to look bewildered* “Do I need one?”

Me: “Yes, especially since it’s a controlled substance.”

Customer: “It is?” *scoffs* “Well I didn’t know that. Some Xanax, then.”

Me: “That is a controlled substance too. Valium, Xanax, alprazolam, lorazepam, diazepam…they’re all controlled.”

Customer: “Well, then!” *hurriedly walks out of the store*
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Why You Always Bring Your Own Dinnerware

Pharmacy | Right | March 3, 2012


(An elderly lady approaches the counter.)

Me: “Can I help you?”

Customer: “Yes, I need some dish bags.”

(Unaware of what dish bags are, I assume she means dish rags.)

Me: “I’m not sure what that is and if we carry it. I would look in the cleaning section.”

Customer: “Well, my doctor said I could get it here.”

Me: “Okay, well I would check that aisle.”

(The customer leaves and returns after a couple minutes.)

Customer: “I didn’t find them!”

Me: “Can you tell me again what it is you need?”

Customer: “Dish bags.”

Me: “And you say your doctor told you to get them here?”

Customer: “Yes!”

Me: “Well, I’m sorry. I’ve never heard of dish bags and I don’t believe I’ve seen anything like that here.”

Customer: “Well, this is ridiculous! What am I going to do?”

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, would you like me to ask our pharmacist about them?”

Customer: “Yes!”

(I go get the pharmacist to assist me.)

Pharmacist: “So, what is a dish bag used for?”

Customer: “Jeeze! You clean your lady parts with it!”
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Perhaps There’s Insufficient Blood To Your Brain

Pharmacy | Right | February 24, 2012


(We have a free self-use blood pressure machine in our pharmacy.)

Customer: “When are you going to fix your blood pressure machine?”

Pharmacist: “Excuse me?”

Customer: “Your blood pressure machine is broken. Every time I come in here, it doesn’t work! You should really take care of it. Lots of old people need to check their blood pressure, you know!”

Me: “Are you sure? I just filled the paper roll the other day. It was working fine.”

Customer: “No, it’s not! I’ve been trying to use it for days. It’s not working. You should really take care of it!”

(I take a look at the machine and try to troubleshoot the problem. I sit in the seat, roll up my sleeve, put it in the cuff, and push the big green “Start” button. The cuff inflates normally.)

Customer: “You mean you’re suppose to push that button?!”
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Weekend Roundup: Don’t Mess With Employees

Fast Food, Gun Store, Pharmacy, Tech Support | Right | February 19, 2012


Introducing Weekend Roundups: each week, we’ll be featuring some of our favorite stories from the Not Always Right archives.

Don’t Mess With Employees! This week, we feature five stories that teach misbehaving customers the consequences of messing with employees.
1.In Real Hot Sauce Now:
A young teenage employee decides her dignity is worth more than £3.71 and dealing with a cowardly manager.

2.A Good Ol’ Fashioned A** Whoopin’:
A customer tries to rough up an employee, but ends up getting roughed up by the manager instead.

3.Hard Drugs And Harder Pharmacists:
Teenage robber, meet Doug. Doug is our new pharmacy tech. Doug is also built like a fridge.

4.Who’s Got The Power Now:
Tech support is happy to support your technology. Supporting your potty mouth, not so much.

5.Your Prank Got Spanked:
A prank caller picks the wrong, well-armed store to call.
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A Dose By Any Other Name

Pharmacy | Right | February 3, 2012


Customer: “Hey, I want some Tylenol.”

Me: “For children or for adults?”

Customer: “For adults.”

Me: “At the moment, we only have the generic kind available. You know, paracetamol, also known as acetaminophen?”

Customer: “No! I don’t want any acetaminophen! Give me the other one!”

Me: “Ma’am, they are the same thing, just different names for the same ingredient.”

Customer: “Well, I just want the first one you named. Just don’t give me the other one.”
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Harvested From The Great Nyquil Tree

Pharmacy | Right | January 25, 2012


Patient: “Hi, my 6-month-old grandson has some congestion in his nose and a fever. I gave him some NyQuil yesterday and that seemed to help. Is there anything you would recommend?”

Me: “For the congestion, you can use these saline drops, they’re–”

Patient: “No! I don’t wanna use that medicated stuff.”

Me: “All right. Well, for the fever you can try this Tylenol. Do you know the wei–”

Patient: “No! I don’t want to use that! It has acetaminophen in it! That’s not safe for babies.”

Me: “Actually, acetaminophen is quite safe for infants.”

Patient: “You’re a pharmacist. You would say that!”

Me: “Well, the only other option is the Advil.”

Patient: “That has acetaminophen too!”

Me: “No, that has ibuprofen. Which is also saf–”

Patient: “No, it isn’t!”

Me: “Are you aware that NyQuil has acetaminophen in it?”

Patient: “You lie! NyQuil has NyQuil in it! Isn’t there anything more natural I can give?!”

Me: “No.”

Patient: “You’re useless!” *storms off
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It’s The Small Victories

Pharmacy | Right | January 21, 2012


(I’ve been working for a quite a while, so my voice is scratchy. Near the end of my shift, an old man comes to the counter.)

Customer: “Hm. You’re losing your voice there, eh?”

Me: “Haha. A little bit, I suppose.”

Customer: “Well, that’s the end of the world for a woman.”

Me: “Ha ha…” *confused as to where he’s going with this*

Customer: “HAHAHA, YOU CAN’T YELL AT ME!” *does a victory dance*
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