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05-23-2022
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#941
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R11 Độc Cô Cầu Bại
Join Date: Aug 2007
Posts: 113,200
Thanks: 7,368
Thanked 46,294 Times in 12,894 Posts
Mentioned: 1 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 511 Post(s)
Rep Power: 141
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What A Diabeetus, Part 4
Alabama, Birmingham, Medical Office, Stupid, USA | Healthy | January 26, 2018
(I am sitting at my desk behind the nurses’ station when one of our new patients approaches me.)
Patient: “Can you do me a favor and check my lab work for me?”
Me: “I sure can, sir. Let me get you pulled up, here. What did you want me to look over?”
Patient: “Can you check to see if there’s any diabetes in my blood?”
Me: “I’m sorry?”
Patient: “Diabetes. In my blood.”
Me: “Did you mean your glucose level, sir?”
Patient: *clearly exasperated* “No, I mean if the doctor found any diabetes in my blood.”
Me: “Sir, that’s… that’s not how diabetes works.”
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05-23-2022
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#942
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R11 Độc Cô Cầu Bại
Join Date: Aug 2007
Posts: 113,200
Thanks: 7,368
Thanked 46,294 Times in 12,894 Posts
Mentioned: 1 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 511 Post(s)
Rep Power: 141
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IOU One IUD, Part 2
Criminal & Illegal, Doctor/Physician, Hospital, Jerk, Maryland, USA | Healthy | January 25, 2018
(I go to a family doctor, meaning she’s qualified to treat children and adults, so she’s been seeing me since I was 12. I’m 18 at the time of the story. This conversation takes place during my annual check-up.)
Me: “Can you write me a referral to the gynecologist? I want to get an IUD.”
Doctor: “What? Why do you need an IUD? You said on the forms that you’re not sexually active.”
Me: “Well, I’m not yet, but I’m leaving for college, and I’d rather be safe than sorry.”
Doctor: “No. No, you’re too young for birth control.”
Me: “Excuse me? I’m eighteen.”
Doctor: “And you’re not married. You’re too young for birth control, and besides, if you have an IUD and you get pregnant, chances are you’d miscarry when you had it removed.”
Me: “Being married doesn’t have anything to do with it, and if I got pregnant while on birth control, it’s not like I’d want to carry the pregnancy to term, anyway. And isn’t the chance of getting pregnant with an IUD, like, less than one percent?”
Doctor: “It doesn’t matter; I won’t write you a referral. Does your mother know you’re planning this? I need to speak to your mother.”
Me: “Hang on. I am eighteen years old—”
(She walks out of the office and into the waiting room and gets my mother. My mom comes into the exam room and listens to her, while I protest.)
Mom: “Um… [Doctor], you do realize you just committed a pretty major HIPPA violation, right? She’s eighteen, and legally an adult. She’s allowed to make these choices herself.”
Doctor: “Well! I am not writing this referral for a young girl to be given an IUD!”
Me: “Fine! I’ll figure it out myself!”
(My mom helped me get an appointment with a gynecologist — which my insurance allows me to do, but the way the system is set up, for non-emergencies it’s much easier to get an appointment if your GP gives you a referral first — and we filed a complaint with the hospital against the doctor. She was an older woman, and apparently this wasn’t the first time she’d tried to push her own agenda on a patient, but it was the first time she’d disclosed medical information without someone’s consent, so she was “encouraged to retire” and no longer practices
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05-23-2022
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#943
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R11 Độc Cô Cầu Bại
Join Date: Aug 2007
Posts: 113,200
Thanks: 7,368
Thanked 46,294 Times in 12,894 Posts
Mentioned: 1 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 511 Post(s)
Rep Power: 141
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IOU One IUD
Bad Behavior, Doctor/Physician, Health & Body, Maine, Nurses, USA | Working | September 8, 2017
(I’m at the doctor’s office with my mother and five-month-old daughter. Due to having my daughter prematurely, then battling an illness, an infection, and an open wound for two months, I’m finally able to talk to my doctor about how I have healed after my c-section, along with birth control.)
Me: “You sure about this, Mom?”
Mom: “Yes, I had one, and it worked beautifully.”
Me: “I just don’t know…”
Nurse: *walks in*
Me: “I’m a bit nervous to get a IUD.”
Nurse: “Oh, you don’t want that.”
Me: “…I don’t?”
Nurse: “No, those things are hell. They hurt, they ruin your uterus, and they can cause you to lose it. Oh, and they can embed themselves and requires surgery to be removed.”
Me: “W-What?!”
Mom: “Hey!”
Nurse: “Besides, you’re breastfeeding. That’ll keep you from getting pregnant.”
Mom: *dryly* “No… it doesn’t, dear. I got pregnant with my youngest while I was nursing my third child.”
Me: “…No. I want the IUD. And I’m not currently nursing… I don’t produce enough.”
Nurse: “I suggest the pill, or keep your legs shut.” *glares at me*
Me: “Excuse you! For one thing, I don’t do well with pills; I forget them very easily! For another, it doesn’t matter to you what I do with my sex life, let alone what direction my legs go.”
Nurse: “Then get the shot!”
Me: “Um, no. With the shot, I hit up so many negative side effects that it’s just not worth it. May I talk to another nurse?”
Nurse: “No, I’m your nurse. Then just get your tubes tied!”
Me: “No. I am not ready to decide not to have any more children at all at this time, despite being scared to have another. It doesn’t feel right. I want the IUD.”
Nurse: “You do not! I’ll put you down for the shot.” *leaves the room*
Me: “No! Mom!”
Mom: “Here. Take your baby. I have an a** to beat.” *leaves the room*
(I sit in the room for only a few minutes, holding and feeding my daughter, when I hear my mother yelling at another nurse. At this point, I can only assume it is the same one. While that is going on, and my daughter has drained her bottle, my doctor walks in.)
Doctor: “I assume that is your mother.”
Me: “Good call.”
Doctor: “Wow! She is big! Healthy little girl. May I?”
Me: “Absolutely!”
Doctor: *holding my daughter* “All right. I see here you want the shot? I thought we agreed on the IUD?”
Me: “We did… apparently the nurse was hell-bent on not letting me get it. She was more than rude, not taking no for an answer, and she scared me with the side effects.”
Doctor: “The side effects really don’t happen often. I’ve yet to see them myself to be honest. I think it’s the best choice for you. Let me go get a different nurse, and we’ll insert the IUD. Here’s your baby. She’s beautiful, and a miracle.”
(I got my IUD, and the nurse wound up fired. Apparently this wasn’t the first time. Nor was it the first time my mother went after a nurse during this whole ordeal. It’s been over a year, and no terrible side effects yet!)
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05-23-2022
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#944
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R11 Độc Cô Cầu Bại
Join Date: Aug 2007
Posts: 113,200
Thanks: 7,368
Thanked 46,294 Times in 12,894 Posts
Mentioned: 1 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 511 Post(s)
Rep Power: 141
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It’s Written In Clear White And White
Doctor/Physician, Ignoring & Inattentive, Medical Office, Silly, The Netherlands | Healthy | January 25, 2018
(I’m 15 years old. I’m at my general practitioner, because I noticed I’ve been having trouble with my eyesight.)
Me: “I can see quite all right with my left eye, but when I only use my right eye, I notice a clear difference in brightness.”
Doctor: “Hmm, let’s see. Could you cover your left eye?”
(The doctor walks to a board with letters and starts pointing at them.)
Me: “B… C… F… X…”
(The doctor goes to the smaller letters, which are more difficult to read. But at some point, I’m totally unable to see where he is pointing.)
Doctor: “This one, please.”
Me: *no verbal reaction*
Doctor: “Hello? [My Name]! This one! Can you read it?”
Me: “I can’t see what letter you are pointing at.”
Doctor: “Oh, wait. Maybe I shouldn’t use a white pen on a white background for this.”
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05-23-2022
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#945
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R11 Độc Cô Cầu Bại
Join Date: Aug 2007
Posts: 113,200
Thanks: 7,368
Thanked 46,294 Times in 12,894 Posts
Mentioned: 1 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 511 Post(s)
Rep Power: 141
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Getting To The Root Of The Issue
Denmark, Dentist, Parents/Guardians, Stupid | Healthy | January 24, 2018
(My dad’s a dentist and I am at his office to pick him up after work because his car is in the shop. His last patient for the day is a little boy of about seven, and the moment I get in I can hear the parents yelling at him.)
Mother: “What do you mean his teeth are rotten?! They can’t be!”
My Dad: “Madam, your son has an extreme case of tooth decay, which is why he’s been having terrible tooth pains. I can possibly mend some of them, but he’ll probably have to have the majority of them pulled.”
Mother: “I can’t believe this. How could this happen?”
My Dad: “Well, does he eat a lot of candy?”
Mother: “He doesn’t eat sugar.”
My Dad: “Do you give him anything at night?”
Mother: “Yes, we give him honey.”
(They got super angry with my dad when he told them that was why their kid had bad teeth.)
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05-23-2022
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#946
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R11 Độc Cô Cầu Bại
Join Date: Aug 2007
Posts: 113,200
Thanks: 7,368
Thanked 46,294 Times in 12,894 Posts
Mentioned: 1 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 511 Post(s)
Rep Power: 141
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The Crap That Comes Out Of Your Mouth
Arizona, Pets & Animals, Revolting, USA, Vet | Healthy | January 24, 2018
(We have just finished working with a cat who was so scared of being at the vet that she soiled herself, and then got it everywhere. I have finished cleaning the treatment area but have yet to wash my hands. As with all health fields, it’s common knowledge that anything on your hands will eventually end up in your mouth if you don’t wash them.)
Vet: “Would you like to look at her ear slide?”
Me: “Sure. Let me just wash my hands first.”
Vet: *jokingly* “You mean you don’t want to end up eating poop?”
(I start giggling.)
Me: “It’s not that I don’t want to ingest poop; I just don’t want to smell it on my hands!”
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05-23-2022
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#947
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R11 Độc Cô Cầu Bại
Join Date: Aug 2007
Posts: 113,200
Thanks: 7,368
Thanked 46,294 Times in 12,894 Posts
Mentioned: 1 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 511 Post(s)
Rep Power: 141
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At Least It’s Still Just A Penny For Your Thoughts
Money, Overheard, Pennsylvania, Pharmacy, USA | Healthy | January 24, 2018
(I am in line waiting to pick up a prescription. The customer at the register is taking longer than usual. The worker tells him to step to the side while they try to sort out the problem. I overhear this between the man who is picking up the prescription and his friend.)
Friend: “It’s only three dollars.”
Man: “I ain’t got that kind of money. Do you know anybody with that kind of money? These is crazy times we live in.”
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05-23-2022
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#948
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R11 Độc Cô Cầu Bại
Join Date: Aug 2007
Posts: 113,200
Thanks: 7,368
Thanked 46,294 Times in 12,894 Posts
Mentioned: 1 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 511 Post(s)
Rep Power: 141
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What A Diabeetus, Part 3
Colorado, Health & Body, Hospital, USA | Healthy | January 23, 2018
(I work in the kitchen of a small hospital. I go to each room and take the patients’ orders for their meals. One new patient is a woman who is on a diabetic diet.)
Patient: *after ordering a huge meal, including iced tea with “a crapload of sugar”* “…and can my brother order something, too?”
Me: “Sure. It’s $5.40 for a guest tray, and you can order whatever you want.”
Patient: “Wait, you mean he can get all the food he wants for $5.40? Holy crap! This is the best hospital ever.”
(The patient’s brother orders a large meal, including a diet soda.)
Me: “All right. Now, since you’re on a diabetic diet, we’ll probably have to cut some of this out, because the rules say we can only give you so many carbs.”
Patient: “Whatever. I eat what I want.”
Me: “Okay. I’ll see what I can do.”
(We end up sending her about half of what she ordered, and using artificial sweetener instead of sugar.)
Patient: *calling back after getting her food* “Um, I didn’t get all my food.”
Me: “Since you’re on a diabetic diet, we can only send you that much. Sorry.”
Patient: “Well, my brother didn’t get what he ordered, either. He was supposed to get…” *she proceeds to list the things she didn’t get*
Me: *after a bit of futilely trying to reason with her* “All right. I can bring a little more food to him.”
(The cook lets me bring some more food to the brother.)
Me: “I’d like to see him put sugar in his diet soda.”
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05-23-2022
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#949
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R11 Độc Cô Cầu Bại
Join Date: Aug 2007
Posts: 113,200
Thanks: 7,368
Thanked 46,294 Times in 12,894 Posts
Mentioned: 1 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 511 Post(s)
Rep Power: 141
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What A Diabeetus, Part 2
Bad Behavior, Grocery Store, Harassment, Ignoring & Inattentive, New Jersey, USA, Wild & Unruly | Right | November 6, 2017
(A customer is getting her money out of her bag. I had put in a low blood-sugar reading in my insulin pump a couple minutes earlier, and it always beeps to remind me to check it again. It beeps, and I unclip it from my waist and turn the screen on. The customer looks up and her eyes go wide.)
Customer: “Of course!”
Me: “What’s the matter?”
Customer: “This is the reason I hate this store! They hire teenagers that look at their phones all the time! They don’t even care about the customers.”
Me: “What? Oh! This isn’t a phone, ma’am.” *presses “okay” and clips it back to my waist*
Customer: “Yes, it is! Give it to me so I can report you to your manager!”
Me: “One, it’s not a phone. Two, I can’t take it off because it’s an insulin pump. I have type-one diabetes.” *shows her my medical alert bracelet* “My manager knows this.”
Customer: “You don’t have diabetes! You’re not obese!”
Me: *tries to resist the urge to face-palm* “Ma’am, I have type-one. The one you’re thinking about is type-two. Please give me the money and leave.”
Customer: “No!” *reaches for my pump, which has a tube that connects to something on my stomach*
Me: *calmly* “Please leave.”
(The customer once again reaches for my pump, and pulls it off my pants. She pulls it forward and realizes there’s a tube on it.)
Customer: “How do you disconnect the charger?”
Me: “That isn’t a charger wire, ma’am. It’s a tube. You can see it’s clear. Please let go.”
(I reach to take my pump back. The customer pulls it forwards again, and I jerk forward. A lot of the time I drop my pump, and it pulls on my stomach. It’s never torn out the thing on my stomach, but this time it’s about to. Luckily, my manager arrives before it does.)
Manager: “Let go of that right now and leave. It’s good that you hate this store, because you’re not coming back.”
(The customer places the pump on the counter and runs to the door, not taking her money or things.)
Me: “Thanks.”
Manager: “Take her money; you deserve it. I’ll put her stuff back.”
(Suddenly, I heard a beep. My manager was also a diabetic, and also had a low earlier. He pulled out his pump, which looked like mine. I heard a loud scream and the door slamming shut.)
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05-23-2022
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#950
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R11 Độc Cô Cầu Bại
Join Date: Aug 2007
Posts: 113,200
Thanks: 7,368
Thanked 46,294 Times in 12,894 Posts
Mentioned: 1 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 511 Post(s)
Rep Power: 141
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What A Diabeetus
Pharmacy | Right | May 19, 2017
(I am talking to a regular customer, who is looking to lose some weight before her wedding, about a fitness professional I follow on YouTube who posts workouts and meal plans for free to help people. There is a customer next to me who is being helped by my coworker.)
Customer #2 : *to me and [Customer #1 ]* “Are you calling her fat?”
Me: *startled* “No, I am not. We’re just talking about fitness and—”
Customer #2 : “You should love your body. Don’t go telling her to change it to fit YOUR standards!”
Me: “I’m not telling her to—”
Customer #2 : *to [Customer #1 ]* “Don’t you love yourself?”
Customer #1 : “I do; I do. I just want to lose five pounds before my wedding.”
Customer #2 : “No! That’s the media talking! You’re being brainwashed.”
Customer: “No, it’s my doctor talking. I’m all for body positivity but a health professional is telling me to lose weight.”
Customer #2 : “When you die from diabetes, don’t come looking for help then!”
Customer #1 : “I couldn’t because I’d be hypothetically dead.”
(Customer #2 sputtered and walked out without her change.)
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05-23-2022
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#951
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R11 Độc Cô Cầu Bại
Join Date: Aug 2007
Posts: 113,200
Thanks: 7,368
Thanked 46,294 Times in 12,894 Posts
Mentioned: 1 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 511 Post(s)
Rep Power: 141
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Totally Toothless Parenting
Children, Dentist, France, Jerk, Lazy/Unhelpful, Parents/Guardians | Healthy | January 23, 2018
(I’m a dentistry student. At my university, we work in different services every half-day. Thursday morning is when I work with kids. A dad comes in with his two-year-old. The kid starts crying the moment he sees the dentist chair, and I know I’m not going to be able to do anything on him, because putting rotating metal things in the mouth of an uncooperative and squirmy two-year-old is dangerous for both him and me. In the patient’s file, I see that the dad was supposed to have taken an appointment with a teacher to have his kid sedated. He obviously hasn’t done so, because I’m the one taking care of him. I can’t even get a good look at the kid’s teeth, because he won’t open his mouth and he keeps crying. I tell the dad that he absolutely needs an appointment with sedation, or else we won’t be able to take care of his kid.)
Dad: “But they’re only baby teeth; it doesn’t matter if they have cavities!”
Me: “If the infection gets out of hand, the adult teeth could get infected, as well, and come out black and rotten. Not to mention that the bone could be eaten away by the bacteria.”
Dad: “So, what should I do?”
Me: “I can’t do anything right now with him in this state, but with sedation we could try it. He needs to be on an empty stomach, though.”
Dad: “Why?”
Me: “Because if not, he could throw up and drown himself.”
Dad: “Sure, but I come from [City not even 15 minutes away]; I don’t have time for this!”
(I call my professor to examine the child, and together we manage to put a temporary solution on the kid’s teeth. It involves a lot of crying and screaming, with an uncooperative dad that doesn’t want to hold his child, and keeps interrupting us to “go for a walk in the hallway” with his kid.)
Me: “Well, that should slow the cavities down, but keep brushing his teeth regularly.”
Dad: “Oh, he doesn’t brush his teeth.”
Me: “I know. He’s two; you’re supposed to do it.”
Dad: “Well, I don’t.”
Me: “You’re supposed to. I don’t suppose he dresses himself yet, either, but still, he’s not naked now. Same thing: you’re the one who made him, so you’
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05-23-2022
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#952
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R11 Độc Cô Cầu Bại
Join Date: Aug 2007
Posts: 113,200
Thanks: 7,368
Thanked 46,294 Times in 12,894 Posts
Mentioned: 1 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 511 Post(s)
Rep Power: 141
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Going For The Condom Minimum
Bizarre, Grocery Store, Missouri, Pharmacy, USA | Healthy | January 22, 2018
(A woman comes up to our night cashier.)
Customer: “I need assistance at the pharmacy case.”
(The cashier pages me to the pharmacy case, as I’m the only one with the key after the pharmacist leaves. I arrive at the case.)
Me: “What items do you need?”
Customer: *hesitates for a moment* “I need condoms.”
Me: *opens the case* “You’re welcome to pick out any of the boxes that you’d like.”
(She picks up a few different boxes, shakes each one, then sets it back down. Then, she turns to me and asks
Customer: “Do you know which one of these feels the best for guys?”
Me: *more confused than surprised by the question* “I’m sorry. I’m afraid I can’t help you there.”
Customer: “Do you know which one fits best, then?”
Me: “I can’t help you with that. I’ve never used any of those.”
Customer: *exasperated sigh* “Oh, well. Better safe than sorry.”
(She put the condoms down, grabbed a pregnancy test, and walked away without another word.)
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05-23-2022
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#953
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R11 Độc Cô Cầu Bại
Join Date: Aug 2007
Posts: 113,200
Thanks: 7,368
Thanked 46,294 Times in 12,894 Posts
Mentioned: 1 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 511 Post(s)
Rep Power: 141
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The Wheelchair Affair
Ignoring & Inattentive, Impossible Demands, Jerk, Office, Oregon, Portland, USA | Healthy | January 22, 2018
(Our office occupies the bottom two floors of the building. There is a medical office on the fourth floor which is accessed by an elevator in the main lobby. Recently, there has been construction in front of the building’s main door, but pedestrians can still access the door. I am in a meeting when I am called to one of our side entrances to deal with an irate couple, a man and a woman.)
Me: “Can I help you?”
(I see that the woman is walking with a cane.)
Woman: “I want you to let me in so I can get to the elevator. I have an appointment!”
Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, but this is not [Medical Facility]. We can’t let you in because this area is restricted. If you want, I can walk you over to the main entrance and you can use the elevators there.”
Woman: “I can’t walk that far!”
(A coworker arrives at this time.)
Coworker: “It’s the same distance, either way. We can’t let you in.”
Man: “Well, we can’t go that way because of the construction! Unless you want to carry her, or you have a wheelchair, we need to get in this way!”
Me: “I’m sorry, but we can’t do that. You can get around the construction; I promise.”
(This goes on for several minutes. After a while, the woman goes to use a phone that’s near the door.)
Woman: “Give me the number for [Doctor]!”
Coworker: “Ma’am, that phone connects to the office I just came from. We aren’t [Medical Facility]. We don’t have the number.”
Man: “Do you have any wheelchairs?”
Me: “No, we don’t.”
(The two finally leave, but not before…)
Woman: “You need to figure out how to handle cases like this better!”
Me: “You have my deepest apologies, ma’am.”
Woman: “What good’s that going to do me?!”
(They walk outside, leaving my coworker and me behind.)
Me: “They seriously want us to stock wheelchairs for people who can’t be bothered to use the main entrance?”
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05-23-2022
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#954
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R11 Độc Cô Cầu Bại
Join Date: Aug 2007
Posts: 113,200
Thanks: 7,368
Thanked 46,294 Times in 12,894 Posts
Mentioned: 1 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 511 Post(s)
Rep Power: 141
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You Can Stomach Getting A New Doctor
Colorado, Doctor/Physician, Ignoring & Inattentive, Medical Office, USA | Healthy | January 22, 2018
(After a change in my insurance, I have to switch doctors. On my first exam, he stares long and hard at a small patch of pink skin on my stomach that my previous doctor dismissed as nothing.)
Doctor: “How long have you had that bright pink spot on your stomach?”
Me: “Three or four years.”
Doctor: “Have you ever had a dermatologist examine it?”
Me: “No, I didn’t think it was anything serious. My GP said it was probably nothing.”
Doctor: “Well, I think it’s probably a basal cell carcinoma. That’s a slow-growing cancer, but if it’s been left alone for years, we need to remove it ASAP. Let me call our dermatologist.”
(The dermatologist confirmed his suspicions, and a growth the size of an apple was cut out of my stomach later that week. It hadn’t spread anywhere, thankfully. Good thing for me I had to change doctors!)
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05-23-2022
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#955
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R11 Độc Cô Cầu Bại
Join Date: Aug 2007
Posts: 113,200
Thanks: 7,368
Thanked 46,294 Times in 12,894 Posts
Mentioned: 1 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 511 Post(s)
Rep Power: 141
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When Tetanus Is Better Than The Cure
Doctor/Physician, Ignoring & Inattentive, Medical Office, North Carolina, USA | Healthy | January 21, 2018
(My mother has a really bad needle phobia. She’s tried therapy for it, but still has panic attacks and worse reactions when she needs shots or blood draws. The people at our old clinic knew about it, but when we move, she has to see a new doctor, and needs her tetanus booster shot.)
Mom: “I have a pretty bad needle phobia.”
Doctor: “That’s fine; lots of people do.”
Mom: “No, I mean really bad. When I see the needle, I’m going to pass out. I’m going to jerk around; one doctor said it looked like I had a seizure. I need you to listen to me. Give me the shot while I’m unconscious. If you need me to sign something giving permission, I’ll do that, but you need to give me that the first time I pass out, because I really don’t want to have to do it twice.”
Doctor: “I’m sure it will be fine. Just don’t look at the needle.”
Mom: “No, that doesn’t work. Just knowing that I’m going to get a shot is enough to trigger a reaction. My doctor said she left a note in my file. Can you look? I’m serious; this is going to be a severe reaction.”
Doctor: “Okay, okay, I hear you.”
Mom: “All right.”
(He pulls out the needle, my mom passes out, and she comes to a few minutes later, with the doctor and a nurse standing over her, trying to bring her around. She tries to sit up.)
Doctor: “Don’t move; you had a seizure!”
Mom: “No, no, I told you: that’s just part of my reaction. I didn’t actually have a seizure.”
Doctor: “You passed out! You were having a seizure!”
Mom: “No, I wasn’t! I told you: this is what happens when I get shots. I’ll be fine in a minute.”
(She starts to move, then notices that there’s no bandage on her arm.)
Mom: “Did you give me the shot?”
Doctor: “No! You were having a seizure! I can’t give you a shot while you’re unconscious!”
Mom: “But I told you to!”
Doctor: “Look, I think we should run some tests to make sure you’re okay. If you are, I’ll give you the shot then.”
Mom: “You know, I think I’ll take my chances with the tetanus.”
(She went to another doctor, who not only listened to her, but gave her a mild sedative, and has since provided her with one whenever she needs blood-work or shots.)
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05-23-2022
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#956
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R11 Độc Cô Cầu Bại
Join Date: Aug 2007
Posts: 113,200
Thanks: 7,368
Thanked 46,294 Times in 12,894 Posts
Mentioned: 1 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 511 Post(s)
Rep Power: 141
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Laughter Is The Best Drug
Doctor/Physician, Hospital, Nurses, Seattle, Silly, USA, Washington | Healthy | January 20, 2018
(Several years ago, I had an accident that required a skin graft on a knuckle. Present day: I hit my hand while working, causing the skin graft to split open, meaning I need stitches. I get to the hospital at about 4:30 pm, and it is PACKED. It is almost 2:00 in the morning before the doctor can even have a look at me.)
Doctor: “Yeah, you will need stitches, so I’m going to give you some novocaine to numb your finger up. We’ll give it 15 minutes to take effect, and get started.”
Me: “Don’t worry about that. It is a skin graft. You would need to poke me where I can feel it, to numb me up where I already can’t feel anything. Just sew it up, please.”
(The doctor agrees, gets a nurse to bring in the kit and hand him stuff, and starts stitching. I can’t feel a thing. After a few minutes, the nurse leans over and asks
Nurse: “So, is the novocaine still working?”
(In my defence, I am tired and incredibly bored, so I just look up with a horrified expression and say
Me: “I NEVER GOT ANY!”
(The nurse’s eyes almost pop out, and she is ready to flip out. The doctor just looks up at me and says
Doctor: “Oh, shut up, you baby.”
(Sorry, nurse, but the doc and I got a good laugh, at least.)
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05-23-2022
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#957
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R11 Độc Cô Cầu Bại
Join Date: Aug 2007
Posts: 113,200
Thanks: 7,368
Thanked 46,294 Times in 12,894 Posts
Mentioned: 1 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 511 Post(s)
Rep Power: 141
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Men Think They Can Have Everything
Bad Behavior, Jerk, Maine, Medical Office, Reception, Stupid, USA | Healthy | January 19, 2018
(I am waiting at a doctor’s office. I have heard some crazy things at this place, but this is pretty nuts, even by their standards. A man is sitting in the waiting room, talking to the receptionist. He’s in his twenties.)
Man: “Can you give me some birth control?”
Receptionist: *looks at him a bit strangely* “Okay.”
Man: “Like, the copper thingy?”
Me: “That’s for girls.”
Man: “Jesus! Why are you so f****** sexist? You dumb b****! I can get it, too, if I want it!”
Receptionist: “Um, actually—”
Man: “I DON’T WANT TO GET PREGNANT!”
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05-23-2022
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#958
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R11 Độc Cô Cầu Bại
Join Date: Aug 2007
Posts: 113,200
Thanks: 7,368
Thanked 46,294 Times in 12,894 Posts
Mentioned: 1 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 511 Post(s)
Rep Power: 141
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Not Listening Is A Disease
Hospital, Ignoring & Inattentive, LGBTQ, Minnesota, Nurses, USA | Healthy | January 19, 2018
(I’m in the ER with a dislocated shoulder.)
Nurse: “Are you on any medication?”
Me: “Synthroid, and I have an IUD.”
Nurse: “Any major surgeries?”
Me: “Appendix when I was 16, I had my thyroid removed last year due to cancer, and a few months ago I had a tumor removed from my foot.”
Nurse: “Any history of thyroid issues?”
Me: “Thyroid cancer, yes, last year.”
Nurse: “Any history of cancer?”
Me: “Thyroid. Cancer. Last. Year.”
Nurse: “Any chance you’re pregnant?”
Me: “No.”
Nurse: “You’re married. Are you sexually active?”
Me: “Yes, my wife and I are active.”
Nurse: “Are you sure you’re not pregnant?”
Me: “No, I’m married to a woman.”
Nurse: “When was your last period?”
Me: “When I got my IUD put in last year. I haven’t had one since.”
Nurse: *disbelieving look* “So, you haven’t had a period in several months, but you’re not pregnant?”
My Wife: “Oh, my. We are sexually active. We are married. Lesbians!“
(The nurse left. A few minutes later, a male nurse apologetically came in and asked for my history again. He was much better and
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05-23-2022
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#959
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R11 Độc Cô Cầu Bại
Join Date: Aug 2007
Posts: 113,200
Thanks: 7,368
Thanked 46,294 Times in 12,894 Posts
Mentioned: 1 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 511 Post(s)
Rep Power: 141
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Very Bad Reception, Part 21
Canada, Lazy/Unhelpful, Medical Office, Quebec, Reception | Healthy | January 18, 2018
(There is a small medical clinic where I live. Usually, for walk-in patients, you get to the door very early, wait until they open it, then head for the desk, where you are assigned an appointment time for the day depending on the order of arrival. Usually, people behave and do not jump forward. Rarely, but sometimes, the clinic isn’t full, and going in mid-morning, you might still get a spot. It’s about 11, and I feel I might have a feminine infection. I stop by the clinic to see if there’s room.)
Secretary: “I’m sorry. There’s a new phone system in place. Now you have to call in the morning and leave your name and phone number. Someone will call you back with the time of your appointment.”
Me: “Well, I’m right here. Can’t you just give me a time?”
Secretary: “No, you have to call.”
Me: “Okay, fine.”
(I make two steps to the side, pick up my cellphone, take the card she gave me with the phone number, and start dialing. The secretary looks at me.)
Secretary: “What are you doing?”
Me: “Calling for an appointment. You said I absolutely had to call.”
Secretary: “Ugh… Okay, I’ll give you one.”
(I believe she suddenly realized that I would have left my info on the answering machine, that she would have listen to it, then call me back with the time, all while I was standing in front of her.)
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05-23-2022
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#960
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R11 Độc Cô Cầu Bại
Join Date: Aug 2007
Posts: 113,200
Thanks: 7,368
Thanked 46,294 Times in 12,894 Posts
Mentioned: 1 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 511 Post(s)
Rep Power: 141
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Very Bad Reception, Part 20
Music | Working | April 21, 2017
(I work at a market research firm. Part of my job involves calling the manufacturers of high-tech devices to interview them. Some of the companies I call are very large, and others are quite small family firms. Some of the smaller companies have local radio stations on instead of hold music. Usually these are country music stations with ads about farm equipment. One time though
Me: “Hello, this is [My Name] calling from [Company]. Could I be connected with [Project Manager], please?”
Receptionist: “Sure thing. Please hold.”
Me: “Okay.”
Hold Music: *really loud gangsta rap* “MY MONEY AND MY HOES!”
(I started laughing so hard I had to hang up and call back again.)
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