(An order comes to my pharmacy for a well-known antibiotic. This antibiotic is known to smell exactly like rotten eggs, so most of us just hold our breath while we count it and try not to think about it too much. We dispense it to a woman who is picking it up for her teenage son. Everything is normal and she leaves with the prescription, but about 10 minutes later she comes stomping back into the pharmacy, pretty much shoves the person that I am currently helping out of the way, and throws the bottle of medication on the counter.)
Customer: “I want to speak to your manager right now! You guys gave me rotten medication!”
Me: “Really? Let me look at the expiration date on your bottle. Normally we don’t keep anything that has one less than a year away.”
(I look at the bottle and see that the pharmacist wrote a date of over a year away, and I go over to our stock bottle and check and the numbers correspond with each other.)
Me: “Hmm. Well, ma’am, it doesn’t look like this medication is expired but I will have the phar—”
Customer: “You are just lying! I mean, come on and open that bottle! It smells totally rotten! I can’t believe that you would ever give someone bad medication! My son is very very ill!”
Me: “Oh, that’s just because the active chemical that is in this medication has a bad smell. Trust me, I wish there was something that we could do about it back here, too. Most of us hold our breath while we count it.”
Customer: “Stop ****** lying to me. You just don’t want to admit you did something wrong! I will have your job for this, b****!
(At this point the pharmacist who has been listening the whole time walks over.)
Pharmacist: “Ma’am, while I don’t like the fact that you are calling my staff names like that I will let you know two things. One is, certain chemicals have a bad smell. It’s just a fact of life. So, while I know that smell is unpleasant, it’s just one of those side effects that come with being able to take medications that will help your sick son. I assure you it’s supposed to smell that bad. If it didn’t, it wouldn’t work right. Two, since you don’t seem to want to listen to my employees and call them awful names, this will be the last time that you or any members of your family can shop or fill any type of medication here. Maybe in the future you can learn how to treat people the way you want to be treated.”
(The woman proceeded to turn bright red with embarrassment and tried to apologize, but my boss wouldn’t hear it. That was almost two years ago and he still will not allow her or her family to fill their prescriptions at his pharmacy.)
Bad Behavior, England, Nurses, School, UK | Healthy | March 22, 2019
(I have recurring nosebleeds. I’m at school when I get my first one this year, and I ask to go down to the nurse’s office. The nurse isn’t there, so I just wait around with a tissue under my nose to catch any leakage. After ten minutes, a nurse comes in. I have never seen her before.)
Nurse: “Look at all the mess you’re making! Didn’t your mother ever teach you manners?”
Me: “I have a nosebleed. I can’t exactly stop it. All the blood is in the tissue, anyway.”
(She huffs and leaves the room. A few minutes later, she comes back with a plaster and attaches it to my nose — as in, over the nostrils — pushing so hard it makes the bleeding worse. I protest, but she leaves the room again. I yank the plaster off and some of the blood drips onto the floor. I’m in too bad a mood to clean it up. She comes back in.)
Nurse: “You messy boy! Look at all the blood on the floor!”
Me: “It’s one drop. I’ll clean it up before I go.”
Nurse: “This wouldn’t have happened if you’d kept the plaster on!”
(I swear at her — admittedly, this was wrong — and she storms out, returning with my tutor.)
Tutor: “[My Name], I hear you’ve been swearing at [Nurse]. You know our policy on this kind of behaviour.”
Me: “I’ll be more than happy to apologise, after she apologises for insulting me and acting like my nosebleed has been a personal grievance to her. She even stuck a plaster on my nose!”
Tutor: “[My Name]! You will apologise this instant, and I’m giving you a detention tomorrow. This is unacceptable behaviour. [Nurse] is the best nurse we’ve ever had!”
(I look between him and the nurse, who is looking triumphantly smug.)
Me: “That isn’t something you should be proud of.”
(I ended up with a week’s worth of detentions or that, but I refused to go — which my parents agreed with after I told them. The last straw was when they sent a letter home saying I had been suspended. My mum went down to the school to speak with the head teacher and the nurse. Apparently, she had only been in the building a couple of minutes when the nurse ran out in tears. The school retracted the suspension, but my parents moved me to a better school equipped with more competent staff.)
France, Hospital, Nurses, Patients | Healthy | March 20, 2019
(After surgery on my leg, I need to pee, so I ask the nurse for help using the bedpan. After I’m finished, I can’t see the contents from my position but she obviously can, and she looks up with a horrified expression
Nurse: “This… This is your urine?”
Me: “Er, yes.”
Nurse: *speechless*
Me: “Oh! I forgot! I’m on my period!”
(She immediately sighs with relief. Sorry for scaring you, nurse!)
Bizarre, Crazy Requests, Ignoring & Inattentive, Pets & Animals, USA, Vet | Healthy | March 17, 2019
(I’m just having one of those “glitch in the Matrix” weeks, where weird things keep happening out of the blue. This is just one example. I work in a vet clinic. It’s Tuesday evening. I’m the only staff member still at work, and we’re less than an hour from closing. The vet has gone to her other office for the evening, and we’re only still open for pickup — meds, patients, etc. The door opens and a woman walks in.)
Me: “Hi. How can I help you?”
Woman: *smiles confidently at me* “Oh, hello. I am here with my chicken.”
Me: *sure I heard wrong since we don’t treat livestock* “I’m sorry, your chicken?”
Woman: “Yes. She is sick.”
Me: “I apologize, but we don’t see livestock here. And the vet is not here currently. But you may want to try [Larger Emergency Vet Hospital]; I believe they see livestock. I can give you their information if you need it—”
Woman: *suddenly enraged, her face turning violently red* “NO! I was told you see chickens!”
Me: “Ma’am, I apologize, but we, unfortunately, do not have a vet who treats livestock here. I recommend trying to see if [Larger Emergency Vet Hospital] is able to see her.”
(Getting redder by the moment, she shoves the basket with her chicken in it in my face; she’d had it under the raised counter where I couldn’t see it.)
Woman: “YOU NEED TO SEE MY CHICKEN NOW! SHE IS SICK!”
Me: “I’m so sorry, ma’am, but there’s nothing I can do. Even if my vet was here — unfortunately, she isn’t right now — she doesn’t treat chickens. Other than referring you elsewhere, I can’t help you.”
(She shoves her chicken in my face again. It is getting increasingly upset each time the owner violently swings her basket into my face.)
Woman: “YOU ARE WRONG! I WAS TOLD YOU CAN SEE CHICKENS!”
(I open my mouth to repeat everything again when the woman abruptly makes a frustrated screech to cut me off. Clearly aware she’s not going to get her way, she stomps out. Then, from the hallway, I hear
Bosses & Owners, Doctor/Physician, Hospital, Ignoring & Inattentive, USA | Healthy | March 16, 2019
(I throw my back out at work. I am a female in my 20s. My line manager, who is male and around my age, gives me a ride to the ER and helps me in as I am in too much pain to walk. We are both in uniform. We speak to a doctor and explain exactly what happened, and he orders an x-ray. Afterward, my manager helps me into a cubicle and the doctor comes back in. I am still in a hospital gown from the x-ray.)
Doctor: “You’ve torn some ligaments. You’ll need to rest for two weeks to let them start to heal. I’ll get you some pain relief, and then you can go home.”
(He leaves and comes back a few minutes later.)
Doctor: “I know you’ve had an x-ray, but I have to ask. Is there any chance you could be pregnant?”
Me: “No, none.”
Doctor: “Are you sure?”
(My manager looks away uncomfortably.)
Me: “I’m certain I’m not pregnant.”
Doctor: “Okay, this will help for a few hours, and I’ll also give you a prescription for some painkillers.” *whips out a syringe*
Me: “Okaaay…”
Doctor: *reaching for my gown* “This needs to go in your buttock, so if you’ll turn around…”
Manager: “I’ll just be outside!” *turns bright red and literally leaps through the curtains*
El Paso, Health & Body, home, Patients, Siblings, Texas, USA | Healthy | March 15, 2019
(My older sister currently works at as an ER nurse. I am woken up one Saturday morning by my cell phone ringing.)
Me: “Hello?”
Sister: “I need you to come downstairs, right now.”
(I get up and walk down to the living room to find her and my parents all watching me descend.)
Me: “What’s going on?”
Sister: “I slipped on the stairs and broke my toe.”
Me: “You need someone to drive you to the hospital?”
Sister: “NO! My coworkers and I always joke about someone coming to the ER because they stubbed their toe. I am not going to the hospital because I hurt my toe.”
Me: “So, what do you need from me?”
Sister: “I need you to reset the bone. Mom is too squeamish and Dad is too gentle. You just need to pull on it quick, like taking off a bandage.”
Me: *shrugs* “Okay.” *walks over and yanks on the crooked toe*
Sister: *gasp of pain followed by a relieved sigh* “Thank you.”
(During her next shift at work, someone commented on her slight limp. She admitted to the accident and the doctor on hand insisted on x-raying her foot. The bone in the toe was indeed broken, but perfectly realigned.)
(I am home alone on our farm one afternoon — my family is out on errands — and there is a knock on the door. When I open the door, a man is standing there and there’s an SPCA van in the driveway.)
SPCA: “Hello, miss. We’ve had a complaint put forth about your animal welfare.”
Me: “What?!”
SPCA: “That horse over there.”
(He pointed at a horse in the field that my mum had taken in from a neighbour who was going to send her to the glue factory — yup, that’s really a thing. She was clearly sickly and dying, but we were giving her the best life we could until she passed, something her previous owner had no intention of doing. It was a serious charge and took almost a week to clear up… and $200 to get the vet out and write a note that we were giving her all the care she needed.)
Bizarre, Illinois, Insurance, Pharmacy, USA | Healthy | March 14, 2019
(My insurance company has decided to stop covering one of my prescriptions for unknown reasons. I get a notice from them on a Friday afternoon, as well as an email from the pharmacy, that the prescription in question is due for a refill. Since it’s Friday at three pm, I figure I’ll just pay the cash price for it this month and call my insurance company next week. I click the link in the email to refill and go back to work. An hour later, I get a text update saying the prescription has been put on hold. I call my pharmacy.)
Me: “Hi. My name is [My Name], and I’m calling regarding my prescription I just sent for a refill.”
Rep #1 : “Sure, I’ll look at that… Oh, it looks like your insurance won’t cover it for whatever reason.”
Me: “I know. I’ll just pay the cash price this month. How much will it be?”
(I wave and walk out. I drive back over the next day, where there is yet another rep behind the counter.)
Me: “Hi, I’m [My Name], and there should be one ready for me.”
Rep #3 : “Yes, it’s filled and ready to go. One minute while I grab it!”
(He grabs it and starts ringing me out.)
Rep #3 : “Oh, um… I need to get the pharmacist. Something isn’t correct.”
Me: “If it’s the copay, I know about it! It’s not an issue!”
([Rep #3 ] disappears into the back. I throw up my hands in frustration. He comes back out a few minutes later.)
Rep #3 : “There’s a copay on this. There shouldn’t be. We can look into this for you.”
Me: “LISTEN TO ME. You are the third person that I’ve explained this to. I know about the copay. It’s fine. My insurance company screwed up. All I want to do is pay and go home!”
Rep #3 : “I apologize for the issue. I don’t know what happened with your insurance… Hold on. Did you say you are going to pay?!”
Me: *through gritted teeth* “YES.”
Rep #3 : “Oh. OH! Yes, I’d be happy to process that for you! No problem!”
(I can only imagine how many temper tantrums people have thrown over copays to prompt that reaction from THREE pharmacy techs
Bizarre, Funny Names, Germany, Insurance, Medical Office, Patients, Reception | Healthy | March 13, 2019
(I work for an insurance company. When people forget or lose their insurance cards, the doctor’s office often calls us to confirm if the insurance is up and running. I get one of these calls.)
Receptionist: “I am calling to confirm the insurance of a patient. It’s [Patient], born [date], living at [address].”
(I look up the data, double checking that I am really talking to a doctor’s office.)
Me: “Yeah, he was insured with us up to [date a few months in the past].”
Receptionist: “Well, do you know where he is insured now? He is sitting here, waiting for treatment.”
Me: “What do you mean, he is sitting there? According to my information, he died a few months ago.”
(Turns out, the doctor had two patients with the same name and birthday, and both were insured with us. And the receptionist called up the file just using that information. Only after we asked the patient for his address did we confirm that he was the other patient. I still wonder what went through his mind when the receptionist told him, “I have your insurance on the line; they say you’re dead.”)
Bizarre, Jerk, Medical Office, Patients, USA | Healthy | March 13, 2019
(I am a medical assistant in a community health clinic, with a fully-stocked retail pharmacy on the premises. This patient uses our pharmacy and has been put on a strict refill schedule for his emergency inhalers due to extreme overuse. Normal use is a maximum of two of each per month. He had gone through nine of [Inhaler #1 ] in two months before the pharmacist contacted the doctor. The pharmacists have counseled him multiple times on proper use, and I’ve reached out multiple times to offer an appointment to address the root cause of his trouble breathing. He declines every time, claiming he needs his inhalers to breathe, that he’s going to have a coronary without them, and that we just want him to not be able to get enough oxygen. Every time I hear this rant, I note that it is extremely long-winded and that he can get through multiple run-on sentences without having to take a breath. His doctor has even called him personally to lay down the refill schedule and explain the cardiac-related consequences of continued overuse. I receive a voicemail from this patient, in which he goes on with another long-winded rant about how the doctor NEEDS to refill his medication. Because of a very well-documented refill schedule and the doctor’s notes that he will NOT refill early under any circumstance, as well as previous in-person discussions with this doctor about this patient, I don’t even need to ask the doctor to advise on the situation. I see that one [Inhaler #2 ] should be available for a refill, but [Inhaler #1 ] won’t be available for another week and a half; he’s literally filled it just a few days ago! I call the patient. This is part of the way into the call, and yes, he is yelling the entire time.)
Me: “With all due respect, the inhalers are only treating your symptoms. Continuing to use them at the rate you were doing so puts you at serious risk for a cardiac event, including a heart attack—“
Patient: “NOT GIVING ME MY INHALERS PUTS ME AT A RISK FOR A CORONARY BECAUSE I’M NOT GETTING ENOUGH OXYGEN. YOU PEOPLE JUST DON’T WANT ME TO BREATHE!”
Me: “Sir, we don’t want you to have a coronary, either, which is why we want to address the root cause of your condition.”
Patient: “NO. YOU STOP THERE. JUST TELL THE DOCTOR THAT HE NEEDS TO MAKE THE PHARMACIST FILL MY PRESCRIPTION! THEN THE PHARMACIST FILL BE REQUIRED TO FILL IT!”
Me: “[Doctor] can’t make the pharmacist do anything.”
Patient: “YES, HE CAN! ONCE HE WRITES THE PRESCRIPTION THE PHARMACIST IS REQUIRED BY LAW TO FILL IT!”
Me: “Sir, [Doctor] is a doctor; he is not a supervising pharmacist. He can only write the prescription. Pharmacies are allowed, by law, to question and even deny prescriptions at their own discretion for patient safety.”
Patient: “DON’T YOU INSULT MY INTELLIGENCE!”
(He didn’t get his inhaler refilled early. I later went down to the pharmacy and told the supervising pharmacist. He found it even funnier than I did!)
Extra Stupid, Medical Office, Patients, UK | Healthy | March 12, 2019
(In the UK, doctor appointments are generally booked in advance, although there are a few reserved for people who phone on the day for emergencies. The phone rings.)
Me: “Good morning, medical centre.”
Patient: “I’d like to make an appointment with a doctor, please.”
Me: “Okay, if it’s urgent, I can fit you in today, or if it’s not urgent I have an appointment in two days.”
Patient: “I don’t know if it’s urgent or not.”
Me: “Okay, well, if you give me a brief idea of what it’s concerning, I can help you decide.”
Patient: “It’s private. I’ll only discuss it with a doctor.”
Me: “Okay, fair enough. So, did you need an urgent appointment or can it wait a few days?”
Patient: “I’ve told you I don’t know if it’s urgent or not!”
Me: “As I’ve said, if you give me some idea of what it’s concerning—“
Patient: *interrupting* “It’s private! I’m not telling the receptionist!”
Me: “That’s fair enough but then I need you to tell me whether or not it’s urgent.”
Patient: “How many times?! I don’t know!”
Me: “Okay, I’ll give an example. If it’s just something like a sick note–”
Patient: *interrupting again getting increasingly angry* “I don’t need a sick note!”
Me: “It was just an example to help explain the difference between urgent and non-urgent appointments. If you don’t tell me which you need, I can’t book you in.”
Patient: “Well, how am I supposed to know if it’s urgent or not if you won’t tell me?!”
(They then hung up without ever having booked an appointment, or even given their name. I guess it wasn’t that urgent after all
Extra Stupid, Laboratory, Non-Dialogue, Safety, USA | Healthy | March 12, 2019
My dad likes to share this story of when he worked in a science lab.
There were massive security protocols in place for everything, but one day, a pile of what looked like rags was left in a high-traffic area. People were basically forced to step on the rags to walk through. Nobody seemed to be paying attention to them, or be concerned that they were just lying there.
My dad saw them when he arrived for the day and was finally the one who followed protocol and called it in.
Apparently, the response was something to behold. The lab was shut down. Nobody in the entire lab facility was allowed to leave until they went through thorough decontamination; since it was a high-traffic area, basically everyone had to be considered “exposed” to… whatever it was. Their clothes and shoes were confiscated. People in Hazmat suits came, collected the rags, shut down the wing for decontamination, and left everyone sitting around for hours, unable to do anything or leave.
At the end of the day, an all-clear was given: “We’ve determined that there’s no contamination or exposure from the rags. However, if anyone develops a fungus-like infection or rash, please report it immediately.”
My dad commented, “That’s so comforting to hear.”
The entire staff got to be dragged in for a refresher on safety protocols and “why we don’t just walk through a potential contamination hazard.”
Assisted Living, Golden Years, Patients, The Netherlands | Healthy | March 11, 2019
(This happens when I am just 17 years old. I get a summer job, one of my first jobs ever, in a retirement home serving coffee and tea in the public living room during the afternoons. This interaction happens with one of the residents. She has Alzheimer’s but I do not know that at the time, and it is one of my first times interacting with someone in that condition.)
Elderly Lady: *very politely* “May I inquire if it is possible for me to stay in the same room one more night?”
Me: *a bit confused, since she lives here* “Um, this is not a hotel, so your room is yours, of course.”
Elderly Lady: “No, I booked a room here and I would like to pay for one more night’s stay, please.”
Me: *still confused* “But this is a retirement home; you live here.”
Elderly Lady: *suddenly a bit shocked and looking around* “Oh, my gosh. I am so sorry; I am in the wrong place! I will go to my sister’s house and stay with her tonight. Thank you.”
(With that, she walks out of the building and leaves me very confused and worried! I realize that this lady does not seem to have a full grasp of the present or reality and I go to find a nurse. I am worried the lady will get lost or injured. The nurse laughs and knows who I am talking about. She says that the lady will come back eventually by herself, as usual. I continue with my tasks but am still worried. When I am almost done with my shift, who would walk in but the elderly lady from before! I immediately walk up to her.)
Elderly Lady: *very politely* “Excuse me. I cannot seem to locate my sister’s house. May I inquire if it is possible for me to stay in the same room one more night?”
Me: “Of course, madam. Your room is ready for you; it is the same room as usual. You are welcome to stay as long as you like.”
Elderly Lady: *enormous smile on her face* “Why, thank you, miss. Such good service. I always enjoy staying here.”
(With that, she happily went to her room. I was so relieved she managed to come back. There was no benefit or point in arguing with her and trying to make her understand her circumstances; it would only make her feel scared, confused, and miserable. I felt that that would just be mean.)
Assisted Living, Golden Years, Patients, The Netherlands | Healthy | March 11, 2019
(This happens when I am just 17 years old. I get a summer job, one of my first jobs ever, in a retirement home serving coffee and tea in the public living room during the afternoons. This interaction happens with one of the residents. She has Alzheimer’s but I do not know that at the time, and it is one of my first times interacting with someone in that condition.)
Elderly Lady: *very politely* “May I inquire if it is possible for me to stay in the same room one more night?”
Me: *a bit confused, since she lives here* “Um, this is not a hotel, so your room is yours, of course.”
Elderly Lady: “No, I booked a room here and I would like to pay for one more night’s stay, please.”
Me: *still confused* “But this is a retirement home; you live here.”
Elderly Lady: *suddenly a bit shocked and looking around* “Oh, my gosh. I am so sorry; I am in the wrong place! I will go to my sister’s house and stay with her tonight. Thank you.”
(With that, she walks out of the building and leaves me very confused and worried! I realize that this lady does not seem to have a full grasp of the present or reality and I go to find a nurse. I am worried the lady will get lost or injured. The nurse laughs and knows who I am talking about. She says that the lady will come back eventually by herself, as usual. I continue with my tasks but am still worried. When I am almost done with my shift, who would walk in but the elderly lady from before! I immediately walk up to her.)
Elderly Lady: *very politely* “Excuse me. I cannot seem to locate my sister’s house. May I inquire if it is possible for me to stay in the same room one more night?”
Me: “Of course, madam. Your room is ready for you; it is the same room as usual. You are welcome to stay as long as you like.”
Elderly Lady: *enormous smile on her face* “Why, thank you, miss. Such good service. I always enjoy staying here.”
(With that, she happily went to her room. I was so relieved she managed to come back. There was no benefit or point in arguing with her and trying to make her understand her circumstances; it would only make her feel scared, confused, and miserable. I felt that that would just be mean
Crazy Requests, Extra Stupid, Great Stuff, Hospital, Patients, UK | Healthy | March 11, 2019
(A friend of mine has had problems with a stomach ulcer for some time. Today it’s causing a lot of pain, so he goes into A&E to get it checked.)
A&E Receptionist: “Since you haven’t been to the hospital with this problem for over a year, you need a referral from your doctor in order to be seen.”
(He then leaves, but sits in the car still in the hospital car park to phone the GP.)
GP: “Well, I can refer you, but if the pain is that bad you need to phone [non-emergency urgent care line] to get an appointment straight away.”
(He phones this number and explains all of the symptoms.)
Call Handler: “With the symptoms you’ve explained, you need to be seen straight away. We’ll send an ambulance on blue lights to you now.”
Friend: “I’m in the hospital car park; I can walk to A&E from here.”
Call Handler: “No, absolutely no walking there. We’ll send you an ambulance.”
Friend: “I’m in the hospital car park! I don’t need an ambulance!”
Call Handler: “With your symptoms, you must be transported to the hospital via an ambulance. It’s not safe for you to get yourself there.”
Friend: “I can see three ambulances from here! I can go and over and sit in one if it makes you feel better!”
(They did eventually consent to allowing him to walk the 50 feet back into the hospital himself.)
California, Medical Office, Patients, USA | Healthy | March 9, 2019
(I work at a sleep clinic work with people who have sleep disorders such as apnea and Hypopnea. These disorders, in a nutshell, make a person stop breathing or breathe so shallowly the oxygen in their blood is affected like with apnea. And I get this almost every time I’m working when I put CPAP on a patient!)
Patient: “Excuse me, miss? I can’t breathe with this thing on!”
Me: *after seeing them stop breathing for almost a minute* “Well, you aren’t breathing with it off, either.”
Bigotry, Ignoring & Inattentive, Medical Office, Nurses, Patients, UK, Wales | Healthy | March 7, 2019
(I am a trans guy, currently at the doctor’s office for an ear infection. The person I’m seeing about it is the nurse practitioner, our practice’s head nurse.)
Nurse: “Are you sexually active?”
Me: “Yes.”
Nurse: “Is there a chance you could be pregnant?”
Me: “Nope.”
Nurse: “I know your partner is male; you could be pregnant.”
Me: “I’m not.”
Nurse: “Just because you think you’re a man, that doesn’t mean you can’t get pregnant.”
Me: “Not pregnant.”
Nurse: “You still have female anatomy. Quit pretending you don’t. All you people are like this, thinking you can’t get pregnant because you think you’re not a girl. I’m giving you a pregnancy test.”
Me: “I had a hysterectomy last year; my medical records are in front of you.”
Nurse: “That doesn’t matter. You people are all like this. I’m giving you a pregnancy test.”
Doctor/Physician, Extra Stupid, Hospital, USA | Healthy | March 5, 2019
(I work in a hospital laboratory. One of the tests we do is clotting times in order to monitor dosages of blood thinners. Basically, we do some magic with the blood, and the machine counts the seconds until the specimen is clotted, hence “clotting times.”)
Doctor: *on the phone* “Hey, do you have the results for [test] yet?”
Me: “Nope, but it’s running right now.”
Doctor: “Well, do you have any idea how much longer it’s going to be? The patient is waiting on their next dose.”
Me: “If I knew how much longer it would take, I’d have the results.”
Liars/Scammers, Medical Office, Texas, USA | Healthy | March 3, 2019
(I work at a multi-doctor cardiology office as a receptionist. This story comes directly from my coworker, who sits beside my station.)
Coworker: “Thank you for calling [Clinic]. How can I help you?”
Caller: “Yeah, I have a return-to-work form that needs to be filled out. Can your doctor get it done for me today?”
Coworker: “Which doctor do you see at our office?”
Caller: “I don’t see anyone up there.”
Coworker: “You would have to be a patient up here for any of the doctors to fill out.”
Caller: “So, they can’t fill it out for me?”
Coworker: “No, you’re not a patient here. They wouldn’t know if you can return to work or not.”
Caller: “Well, can I see one of the doctors today?”
Coworker: “They wouldn’t be able to see you today, no. What do you need the signature for, anyway?”
Caller: “I hurt my leg.”
Coworker: “I don’t think a cardiologist can sign on a leg injury unless it’s vein related. You may need your primary doctor to sign it.”Caller: “I don’t have a doctor. I just wanted someone to sign my letter so I don’t have to work
Health & Body, Non-Dialogue, Patients, Pharmacy, Revolting, Silly, USA | Healthy | March 1, 2019
I had been having horrible stomach cramps, to the point where I could barely stand. I’ve already had my appendix removed, so my doctor ran a few other tests and determined the pain was from a bowel obstruction. He sent me home with instructions to drink more water and take a laxative and some OTC pain killers.
While waiting in the checkout line with my purchase, several waves of cramps came over me and I started seeing stars. The cashier saw me start to stumble and called for help. More stars appeared before the pain became so intense I passed out.
When I regained consciousness, there was a crowd surrounding me with a mixture of emotions on their faces. Some were concerned, others embarrassed, and others looked like they were trying not to laugh, but none of them are looking at me. I started to sit up and the associate closest to me — the pharmacist who helped me pick my laxative — told me to stay still and wait for the ambulance to arrive.
I asked what happened and the pharmacist blushed deeper. I looked down to make sure I hadn’t lost control of my bladder. I hadn’t, but then I realized my stomach didn’t hurt as much anymore. I made that comment aloud, and some of the crowd laughed. A man from the crowd leaned in and told me that when I hit the floor, I’d released the biggest, loudest, longest fart he’d ever heard out of any human being.
The people gathered around were obviously there to see how I handled the news of my flatulent faux pas. I was terribly embarrassed, but I was also so relieved that I wasn’t in pain anymore, I just laughed until I cried. The ambulance arrived shortly thereafter and gave me the okay to go home. I apologized to everyone in the vicinity and told them I hoped the rest of their day went better than mine.
Diễn Đàn Người Việt Hải Ngoại. Tự do ngôn luận, an toàn và uy tín. V́ một tương lai tươi đẹp cho các thế hệ Việt Nam hăy ghé thăm chúng tôi, hăy tâm sự với chúng tôi mỗi ngày, mỗi giờ và mỗi giây phút có thể. VietBF.Com Xin cám ơn các bạn, chúc tất cả các bạn vui vẻ và gặp nhiều may mắn.
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